Celebrate Pride with the kids: a family-friendly survival guide

By Ariel Messman-Rucker

For adults, Pride Month festivities are an excellent way to experience community, open expressions of sexuality and gender, and they serve as a powerful message about queer people's right to exist in public spaces. But it can also be a fun and validating experience for kids and teens. As a kid growing up in the '80s and '90s with an out lesbian mom, there were times I had to lie about my mom and her partner, censor myself at school and in front of conservative family members, and couldn't avoid hearing the Moral Majority rail against the queer community on the nightly news or watching as sitcoms and late-night talk show hosts made gay people the butt of jokes.

One of the only times I got to experience open expressions of queer joy and meet other kids whose families looked like my own was at Pride. My mom took me to San Francisco Pride every year, and the parade and festival felt like an oasis in a world of hate. It was a place where my family was accepted, making it a refuge from the judgment of my peers, their parents, my teachers, and the government's refusal to grant gay marriage or equal rights. Plus, it was so much fun!

I got to march in the parade with PFLAG (Parents and Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) alongside other LGBTQ+ families, including one year where I got to walk on tall stilts with long rainbow pants alongside other kids in a colorful show of solidarity. I got the chance to ride on the back of a family friend's motorcycle with Dykes on Bikes, marched proudly with my family, and got to meet and hang out with queer kids and other kids with queer parents. Going to Pride with my family was an experience I looked forward to every year.

As an adult, I’ve also had a blast marching in Pride parades with the LGBTQ+ kids and teens in my family, and it has been incredibly rewarding to watch them open up and blossom when a supportive queer community surrounds them. So, although people come out of the woodwork every year to yell, "Won't someone please think of the children?" and start tired debates about whether kink and expressions of sexuality belong at Pride, families have been and will continue to come to Pride celebrations to have a fun and cathartic time. Your kids may see men in leather or people wearing less clothing than they usually would, but that just opens the door for frank discussions about the new things they're witnessing.

While, in some ways, the world is a vastly better place for the LGBTQ+ community than it was decades ago, far-right conservatives are now systematically attacking those hard-won rights. But for one month a year, the queer community comes together to protest, celebrate, and party. So ignore right-wing zealots who say that Pride isn't for kids, and get out there and celebrate with the kiddos in your life!

• 1. Be a spectator
• 2. March with a Pride contingent
• 3. Dress up in fun costumes
• 4. Attend family-oriented festivals
• 5. Drag queen brunch or story hour!

1. Be a spectator

Watching a Pride parade from the sidelines is a great way to introduce the young people in your life to Pride. Get there early, grab a good spot, and cheer the marchers on! You’ll likely see elaborate floats, drag queens dressed to the nines, passionate non-profits, talented dancers, live music, and families too.

2. March with a Pride contingent

While watching the parade will bring smiles to little ones’ faces, marching in the actual parade can be a magical experience. Many Pride march contingents would love to have families march with them. In San Francisco, the public school district invites students and families to join them, and in Portland, Oregon, kids and teens can march with the New Avenues for Youth’s Sexual and Gender Minority Resource Center (SMYRC). Similar youth and family-oriented groups are marching in most cities, so do some digging or contact the parade organizers to find a contingent that fits your family.

3. Dress up in fun costumes

Pride is a great time to wear bright colors and dress up in wild costumes. Paint rainbows on your faces, cover yourself in glitter, wear Pride-themed clothing, or, better yet, wear matching family costumes! Get the kids in your family involved in making or picking out costumes — this is where their imaginations and creativity can shine.

4. Attend family-oriented festivals

Many Pride festivals have activities and booths geared toward kids and teens. There are often bounce houses and face painting for younger kids; some even have parties for teens. For instance, Dallas Pride has a Family Pride Zone and a Teen Pride with entertainment and live music appropriate for teens, Boston Pride has activities for the whole family to enjoy, and Los Angeles Pride even has a Youth Pride Prom for teens!

5. Drag queen brunch or story hour!

Many cities have drag brunches as part of their Pride Month calendar, and since they’re held during the day they are usually family-friendly affairs. Kids love the ostentatious costumes, over-the-top personalities, hilarious jokes, and delicious breakfast foods! There are also often drag queen story hours available for the younger kiddos.